rosedainty

her. i don't really have to say her name, but her sweet face always carved in my head, automatically pop-up whenever i hear the word 'comfort person'. she was the greatest girl gift in my life, wouldn't ask for more friends. she's enough for me. i hate that i can't find the comfort of her in others, especially in men. maybe that's why my relationship never succeed. i never comfortable with men like when im with her. i always try to find the comfort in others, but i can't. maybe i should stop trying hard to find the comfortness she gave me in others. but i hate that i always depends on her. i can say that im an independent girl but when im with her, im a weak ass. she always make me feel touched, maybe she doesn't even know it. she always doesn't even know it or forgot things. she might forgot what im gonna tell u guys below. she's the one who touch my faces when im having chickenpox, to clean my face (theres nanah at my face that time). while

tbh, i really tought my butterlies is dead. i really did. for few years, i did not feel any butterflies anymore. im happy, but no butterflies in my stomach. no, don't talk to me about butterflies in stomach is just a trick for nervous yada-yada, stophhh. let me enjoy things. but one day, i felt butterflies, really a lot. you know why? not because i wanna terbirak so much. its when my friend told me she's pregnant. do you know how happy am i? i always want that. to have a tiny feet, tiny badump-badump in your uterus... how magical feeling it can be? i always want to be a mother. checking on how to adopt kids kinda my annual thingy. i've gave hints to my parents but the. forbid it, and i didn't blame them for not approve and think like me. because i know, whatever it is, they always want the best for me. nope, when i say i want kids/baby i didn't really want to get married (lot's of drama and i have to meet men) or having sex or yada-yada, i just want a kid