'bus'

hi lovelies,

today i would like to share about buses.

i have a favourite bus once.
how i wish i can take it every day, the same lovely bus.
despite of the loneliness, no music played,

i still want to take it. i've loved it.
the calmness its gave,

the randomness.

i've crave to be a passenger for too long,

and when i got chance,

i appreciate every seconds,

and took care of it the best as i can.

but one day, the bus take off earlier than i expected.
i was disappoint at first,
but then i remembered.

it's not the first time i was abandoned like that.

this is the third time,

i should've known.

but i still, stupidly waiting for it.

maybe it will apologized just like before and willing to take me again.

i'm still hoping it will come back.

but i was wrong.

i waiting too long.

i was drained, tired and alone at the bus stop.

i should've take another bus.

i shouldn't wait for too long.

i've missed buses.

the buses i've never tried,

i'll just assume all buses are same.

after few years, i tried to take another bus,

i want to step out from my comfort zone,
but not in a quarter halfway,

i decided to get off.

i know that i'm rather walking than sitting on other than my favourite bus.

some buses are just too loud, accelerates too fast,

too slow, and some are too gloomy.
i didn't find comfort, neither calmness.

thats when i know i don't need bus.

i can survives on my own legs.

i walk alone.

humming by my own,

amazed by the nature,

eating my favourite snacks,

i was beyond happy.

until my legs worn out,

and the weather was unstable someday.

i desperately want a bus.

i search for it.

i didn't care anymore.

i didn't put any expectation anymore,

i just want a ride,

to sit, to rest my exhausted body,

at least, to rest along the way.

in one try,

i found it.

its hard to believe but...

it was a good bus.

i thought all bus are the same,

but its shows its not.

its set another standards.

i had fun along the ride,

the comfort it gave,

the offers candies,

the melodies it plays,

the beats was match with my heartbeat.

how i wish it was a long way to go,

i don't want to reach my destination anymore,

i can stay just like a home,

i just want to be happy.

but,

day by day,

the bus got slow down.

much slower that i think to myself,

maybe its a sign for me to get down.

but no announcement was given.

or maybe theres invisible passengers that i didn't see,

maybe because i got nothing to offer,

and maybe its just me, the problematic passenger.

the ugly one.

it feels like a lonely journey,

i tore the seats, i stomp on my feets,

my inner child tantrums a lot,

and everything just got worse.

i'm sabotaging myself,

too afraid the thought of being thrown,

i'm surely will bleed again,

thats what a burden like me deserved.

i realised,

i should've been attached to anything,

or i will broke them down too.

i was a misfortune ever happened.

maybe i should just stay at the bus stop,

until i feel wiser again.

i promise,

i won't ask for more.

just some good memories for my old days.

i wish the next time i'm stepping into another bus,

its gonna be a last ride,

either got a seat or got hit.

but this is not about bus...